19 January 2010

Look. . .

How do we inject into christian music the creativity and energy and innovation that pre-christians have in their music? God changes my heart every time we worship - I frequently am halted by my own feelings that what I'm participating in is artistically stale and dying [ewwwww! stinky]. Then Jesus (and His phantastic Holy Spirit) swoop into my heart and remind me that He's a total cheeseball, and He doesn't at all mind if the praise of His people sounds just like it did ten or fifteen years ago, and He melts my heart with His. And that's so good. But.

But I'm so tired in my heart of the same old thing. It just reminds me of the other types of complacency we have in western christianity. Nothing in our lives should be boring or static! Nothing should be the same as it was five years ago, because we are not the same as we were. How could I make the same music as I did five years ago? I'm not who I was five years ago. I really am a completely different person. I don't remember that person but at a distance. She is not me. We don't think even similarly. I don't want my diving into Jesus to ever slow. I know what people say, that it's more dramatic and passionate because I'm younger.

I don't believe it. That is a lie! Worse than outright falsehood; it's a sneaky lie - almost believable. Sort-of-understandable. But, nonetheless full of CRAP! I think of several men and women in my church. In their fifties, in their seventies. Passionate, radical, to-the-point-of-crazy about Jesus. It doesn't have to stop. I'm not feeding myself that. I refuse.

So, I want the music I play and make and love to be different. God, I praaaaaay that the bands I love most, I enjoy most, will love Jesus! because I cannot say that right now. and it makes me want to cry.

The song I want you to listen to [click on the post title] is called "Blessa" by Toro y Moi, courtesy of gorillavsbear.net. Beautiful. Love.

1 comment:

  1. I agree with this. I want my worship to be an exploration of God, myself, my circumstances, and the interaction of all three, and for it to reflect the infinitely dynamic nature of those things.
    Ideally, I would like every time I worship to be an exact expression of my current state rather than a constant repetition of other people's expressions. The difficulty is making that idea accessible to the people you are leading in worship (unless you're not), otherwise I will be the only one worshiping, and therefore will have failed as a "worship leader".
    However, this is something I do want to explore.

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